The Four Agreements…A New Years Gift to you
I rarely if ever read “Self-Help” books. There have been a few authors that have touched me with their wisdom (ie: Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson, Don Miguel Ruiz, to name a few) and through their readings my life has been changed. Now the thing about these types of books is they don’t change you per se, the author is merely giving you the tools for you to change yourself. A key for a lock, new ways of seeing what we just can not get clarity on at times.
We all have imperfections and I am of the firm belief we are each valuable, necessary and wanted. It is up to us to give to others (and ourselves) the very best. I am sharing with you “The Four Agreements”.
I first read this book by Don Miguel Ruiz just a year ago and already see a difference in myself and the way I walk these roads of life. I have much work to do but then aren’t we all works in progress.
This is a book I wish I had of read many years ago but it’s never to late to learn.
I’ve read it more than once and the 5th agreement as well. It’s all anyone needs. Thanks for the reminders!
I actually am in the middle of reading “The 5th Agreement now”. We all need reminders
Not taking things personally was so powerful to me, but it’s not easy. That is why I leave this book out at all times. I’ve already printed this out to hang at work!
Happy New Year!
Good advice! I’ll try to remember those.
My pleasure and Happy New Year!!
very wise counsel! thank you for sharing! z
Thought I would share what I also am reminding myself of..these agreements!!
Always good to remember these. They are so simple and yet they slip away over the years it seems. Thank you for the reminder!
You are quite welcome and yes, there are some that need refreshing in my life as well!!
The four agreements sound very fine and meaningful. I like how they are sensible and based on self-respect from which respect for others comes.
Thank you,
Daniela
Everything starts withinn. Respect, Love, attention.. we take care of us the world gets taken care of in return.
I think #2 is important, but it’s the idea I have the most trouble putting into practice.
For me it’s #3. I am horrible about making assumptions, jump to the wrong conclusion, etc.. Working on it though
great advise-hope i have the courage to use it.beebee
BeeBee- I have no doubt if and when you are ready, your courage will surprise even you. Keep moving forward my friend
I’ve never read this book, but I want to now. 3a strikes me as the most difficult.
I just said in another comment #3 is my weak area.. I’m working on it though..
All four agreements are so valuable that even if we just accomplished one of these, it’s likely our lives would dramatically change. Definitely something to aim for. I think, unlike other self-help books, this one is doable.
I like what you said about self-help books. It’s so true. I think sometimes people buy them believing that their lives will be magically transformed with new information. You have to be ready to internalize new insights, otherwise, the words will just fall flat. We learn, precept upon precept. No one can jump ahead until they’ve done and mastered the earlier work.
Thanks for this bit of wisdom, Lynne. You’re always so timely with your posts.
Lisa
Lisa, I stopped reading those “magical, will change your life” books.. Now I focus on bits and pieces I find and incorporate them in my life. This however is one book I will re-read anually as a refresher for my brain and life.
It’s well worth the read
I’m not a huge fan of these. Many people read them and try to do word-for-word what the author says, instead of adapting them to fit their lives.
I’m glad you were able to get something out of it to move yourself towards where you want to be!
(My favorite self help book is Men Who Wear Wool and the Women Who Hate Sheep.)
(Changed my life!)
(Just not sure how…)
Yes, like I said I don’t do the cure-all books.. These 4 little notes are really common sense for us all.
I’ll have to look up that book of yours
Sometimes we try and remember to act like that. But it’s neat to have it summarised like that in a pithy and succinct manner.
I think the fact these are in a concise, common sense format is why people do remember and enforce them. Some of the books out there are down right pitiful.
These are great. I tend to really take things personally!
Yes, me too.. All we can do is keep fine tuning ourselves!
That is a wonderful summary. I have copied it for my wisdom page. Thank you.
Clare, just save the picture and then you will have them all colorful-like
Well, yes. Colourful is good. I may blog on it, too.
I have the book and read it about six years ago–think I will pick it up again–I wrote a newspaper column based on it and people stopped me in the grocery store and told me I was wise–I sure had them fooled–thanks for reminding me of this book
I only recently read it but have never forgotten how I felt when I put it down. One of those “Ah-Ha moments”.. Thought I’d share for the new year!!
it was a good choice to share and I want to renew my acquaintance with the four agreements
Ohhh #1 & #2 for serious. Say only what you mean!!! That is so super important. Also I’m the worst at taking things to heart… mostly I think because I expect people to be decent (is that really asking so much?!) and then they’re not and I’m like totally crushed. That actually just happened yesterday so this is SO appropriate.
#3 is my weak spot.. I have a bad habit of assuming the worst. I am learning how to not always expect negativity just because I had it in the past.
glad you can find these reminders useful !!
So much has to do with communication… saying what you mean and listening to what others say… and not taking things too personally. Peggy and I rarely argue but when we do we are often amazed/amused/bemused by the role of miscommunication.
Yes indeed.. many times we as people take things to heart or mis- hear/read what another is saying and it really could help us all if we followed these principles.
My daughter read this book years ago, and I never bothered as I am not into self-help books. Maybe I should read it.
I’m like you, don’t do the “self-help, have I got a quick fix for you” books either. thisone is different.. Pick up a copy!
I have never heard of Don Miguel Ruiz. I will need to check him out. I like #3 best. Courage to speak directly and clearly are skills I continue to work on. Love this list.
I first heard about him I think on Oprah from ellen Degeneres but never bothered reading it until last year. Wish I had of read it years ago..
It took a trained psychologist to help me understand and apply #2. I thought I was wasting my money when he wouldn’t let me talk about my problems, but kept directing me back to #2 instead. I’m glad I finally listened.
Thanks for the reminder. I’m smiling as you make me remember how upset that shrink used to make me.
I like the premise of this book. I think I’ll look for a copy. Thanks for passing it on, Lynne.
The premise is about honesty and respect and I do think you will enjoy reading.
Happy New Years to you from the Gulf Coast to your West Coast!!
I hate it when I’m the last to comment – by then all my words have been said – stolen, really, by all your wonderful followers! Thanks for sharing, Lynne, I’m gonna have to check out that book.
As we say in my family- “Happy Newey Day!”
I love these! I read the book a few years ago (at my father’s recommendation), and since then, I’ve included them in the reminders I write on the cover of my calendar each year. They are THAT powerful and have had a huge impact on my life. Thanks for your wonderful guidance, Lynne.
It’s been so long since I’ve read this that I barely remember it. Guess that means it’s time for a reread.
Hope you have a fulfilling New Year.
Amen sister. Many of the authors you mention (all except one which I’ll check out) are on my shelves and have helped me through numerous valleys and peaks over the years.
Of all I have (& have not) read, Marianne Williamson is the one I admire & respect the most. She showed me how to find my inner compass and worth as a woman. Yes, you & I think alike!!
Everyday Grace is one of her’s that I love. I was just talking to my niece two days ago about listening to Williamson on the radio and her take on relationships and how who you attract has more to do with ourselves than others. Which book are you referring to? She has so many. Tempted to buy it for my niece who might need it right now.
The book that turned my life around after my divorce (I actually read it a few years prior, so I think it made me aware going into that period, gave me strength) is called “A Woman’s Worth”..I gave a copy to my daughter and she loved it..Yes, your niece would to I think!!
Thanks…. I’ll look for it.